failure.

failure is a feeling

a haze that hangs around

my body

and it makes me blind

with cloudy eery eyes

 

I wake up in the morning

just the self-same as the night before

I hoped that maybe dreams

would cleanse my mind

in the early morning hours

but failure looms as smoke

by my ceiling

 

failure is a frenzy

racing to and fro in an

anxious mind

two hundred beaming words

can’t cancel out a lurking feeling

 

the funny thing about failure

is that it loves to lie

it has a PhD in deceit, actually

much too intelligent for me

 

it’s hard to differentiate

between truth and lies

in everyday life

but even harder when

the screaming fight is

deep inside

 

inevitably I will see again

but failure will settle down

in the void, making its room

in my soul

comfortable

fitting sheets to the bed

hanging pictures on the walls

 

maybe it will never get its

letter of eviction

maybe I will never have

enough affirmation

maybe it’ll burst out

when I least expect it

 

I can learn to live that way,

I guess

I may not be as pleasant

but I never really was

to begin with

 

though,

I believe that there will be a day

when someone or something

comes along with a message

of worth

it will smoke failure out

evacuation sirens will

blare

 

and I’ll feel free

and laugh all day when

failure frantically tries

to gather its belongings

before it burns

to death.